


Frostbite

by oddtwist



Category: Tatort
Genre: Awkward Kissing, Fluff, Humor, Love Revelation Epiphany, M/M, Münster, Slash, Slightly Frozen Thiel, Slightly Intoxicated Boerne, sorry not in German
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-05-04
Updated: 2014-05-04
Packaged: 2018-01-21 21:17:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1564409
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/oddtwist/pseuds/oddtwist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thiel wants to prevent Boerne from driving home after having tasted too much wine. Boerne is worried (frustrated really) about finding the right Christmas gift for a certain colleague.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Frostbite

**Author's Note:**

> I was pleasantly surprised to find a Tatort community here on AO3. This one was written in December 2011 for the Tatort Adventskalender on LiveJournal. Thought I'd post it here since my lj got hijacked and many posts disappeared.

Thiel drove his bicycle to the front entrance of "Le Candide" just as the door opened and a man emerged, pausing on the steps to take a deep breath of cold night air. The policeman carefully avoided the frozen snow on the driveway, but the thin tires of his bicycle were already skidding: he hopped off before he would lose control.

"Thiel!" Boerne greeted, on his cheeks the cheerful flush of a man who'd had a few drinks too many. Thiel was chilled to the bone - his cap and scarf gave him little protection against the freezing cold. It had been snowing again and the streets of Münster were covered in a pristine white. Thiel was not prepared for winter yet. He still hadn't found the time to fetch his winter coat at the dry cleaners where he'd left it last spring. He parked his bicycle against the wall and went up to meet his colleague on the frozen steps, where freshly fallen snow marked the way to the warmth inside the building.

"Ev'ning, professor. How are we doing tonight?"

"Marvellous! Truly marvellous, my friend." Boerne jovially wrapped a scarf around his neck and placed the matching chequered hat on his head. "What brings you here? Don't tell me you want to try out the wine tasting tonight."

"I don't care much for wine." Thiel said and nodded at the owner of the restaurant, who closed the door behind his departing guest. Wolfgang was a friend and he had called Thiel as soon as he understood that Münster's city coroner thought himself fit enough to drive home in his new BMW. Now that he was here, in the piercing cold, Thiel wondered why the hell he felt responsible for his next door neighbour. If Boerne wanted to get himself arrested, that was his business. He was old and wise enough to know he shouldn't be driving after a drink.

"Excellent wines, really." Boerne went on. "Very hard to make a good choice."

"I see. You probably took a sip or two too many, then." Thiel noted when he saw that Boerne had trouble finding the car key on his key chain.

"Are you accusing me of being drunk?"

"I wouldn't dare, professor. I'm just here to see that you get home safely. And because I know that you would never allow me to drive you in your precious car, I called you a taxi."

"Nonsense!" Boerne spoke indignantly. "It's just around the corner. I'm perfectly capable of driving home in a straight line."

"It's the curves I'm worried about." said Thiel, escorting Boerne to his car. Although he had the smell of alcohol about him, the professor's stride was confident, unlike Thiel's, whose limbs felt as if they were filled with cement.

"I just had one or two sips, Thiel. It was a wine tasting evening, you know; emphasis on tasting."

"Whatever." Thiel snatched away the keys, before the professor could open the door with the remote control. "Let's wait for the taxi." 

Flabbergasted, Boerne stopped in his tracks. "Give me my keys."

"You'll get them back tomorrow."

"Thiel, I swear if you don't give me my keys I will..., " he swallowed, nearly choking on at least five threats he was about to utter.”Do you realise that this is all your fault?"

Surprised by this sudden change in tactics, Thiel let out a laugh. " _My fault_? How can it be my fault when you decide to get drunk this evening?"

"I am _not_ drunk! And I am merely saying that if it weren't for you I wouldn't be here in the first place."

"You can blame me for a lot of things, Boerne but getting you loaded during a wine tasting party is not one of them."

"Well, if your father and your friends and colleagues would have helped me out, we would not be standing here."

"What have they got to do with this?"

"I came here tonight in order to find you a Christmas present, because the people who are close to you and should know one or two things about you, were not in the least bit able to help me with suggestions about a gift. All they came up with were vague descriptions of what you might like this year -absolutely no help at all. I should´ve known better." His voice had skidded from frustration to agitation by the time they'd reached his car. "If they had not been so un-cooperative, I would have thought of this sooner. I was hoping to buy you some nice bottles of wine tonight, so you can finally poor all that awful beer of yours down the drain."

"You did what?"

Boerne ignored his question and rambled on as if Thiel was personally responsible for his predicament. "Do you know how much bloody time I spent on finding the right gift for you? _Do you_? And now you have the gall to tell me that you don't care much for wine!"

"You asked my father what I would like for Christmas?"

"Your father, Nadeshda, Alberich…..I even asked Klemm for God's sake!" In his anger he cleverly backed Thiel against the BMW and started searching his pockets. The intrusion on his privacy actually warmed Thiel up and he giggled under Boerne's touch. Frustrated when he didn't find his keys, Boerne looked up at him, demanding he give them back. Thiel had no intention of doing so.

"You never asked me."

"What?"

"You never ever asked _me_ what I would like for Christmas."

Boerne looked down at him from beneath thick, dark lashes. His view of Thiel's face was rather blurred due to the clouds of visible breath between them, but the professor could tell that it was better to indulge the man at this point if he wanted to get home anytime soon. He sighed and popped the question.

"Thiel," he paused solemnly for a moment and gave him a sincere look." my dear colleague, neighbour ...friend, what would you like for Christmas?"

"Why, you of course."

The words instantly froze solid in the air between them. When he realized what he'd just said, Thiel's heart began to pound so hard that he was sure the other man would hear it. The sweet scent of warm wine reached his nostrils and made him feel dizzy. 

Boerne looked at him, but his eyes were shaded by the rim of his hat and Thiel was left in the dark about his reaction. The professor cleared his throat and straightened his back as if he were about to deliver a speech, but the words didn't make it across his lips. He still had Thiel pinned down against the car, his grip had loosened but he didn't let go.

"Me." was all he said, as if saying it would make it more real and make him understand the ramifications.

"Yes." Thiel said confidently, glad that this burden was finally off his chest.

They had known each other for such a long time and all the people he knew, had hinted that Boerne might like him more than he let on. Thiel knew that there was always a chance that they'd got it all wrong and if he was truly honest with himself, he'd have to admit that it would break his heart.

"Are you done searching my pockets?" he said in an attempt to break the awkward silence.

It made him nervous that the man who was never at a loss for words, now seemed to freeze up entirely - quite literally in fact. He leaned in to look underneath the hat and noticed that Boerne's eyes had adopted a stupefied gaze. Thiel felt his earlier bravado die and decided it might be better to cop out. Boerne obviously had a lot to think about and right now, Thiel was not quite sure about his own emotional state of mind. This revelation could not have been more poorly timed, out here in the middle of the night in frigid conditions. He freed himself from Boerne's half-hearted grip, but the professor caught hold of him again and pushed him back against the car.

"How..." he began, but his voice died somewhere deep inside his throat, "...when..."

He suddenly remembered what Herbert had told him when he asked about a suitable present for his son. " _If you could gift wrap a human being, I would know the perfect present_." Boerne assumed that he had been referring to Thiel's son in New Zealand, but now the penny dropped.

All the pennies dropped.

Nadeshda's whimsical statement " _If you don't know that by now, I certainly will not help you._ ", Alberich's cryptic remark " _One thing will please you tremendously: the right gift won't cost you a penny._ “and even the curious look Klemm had given him, that made him feel like the village idiot who couldn't see the bleeding obvious. They knew. Everyone knew! Thiel was in love with him. He couldn't help smiling when he finally understood.

This was a smile unlike any Thiel had ever seen on his face in all the years they had known one another. There was a childlike innocence in the expression –a sense of wonder.

"Do you want your present gift-wrapped?"

Thiel didn't fail to notice the sudden mischievous glint in his eye.

"I think you are sufficiently wrapped already."

"Well, don't you want to unwrap your gift?"

"Now?" Thiel asked and thought:  _here_?

"It is customary to unwrap a present to see what's inside before thanking the generous giver."

He was a bit surprised by the sudden urge in Boerne's voice, not to mention by the strange request, here in the middle of a parking lot in the freezing cold. But he was obviously not joking. Thiel could see it in the heat of his eyes and felt his own excitement grow. Boerne released his grip on the other man. Thiel hesitated, still unsure if Boerne wasn't playing an incredibly cruel prank on him.

"Shouldn't we..."

.. _go home first_?, was what he wanted to ask but Boerne smothered the words with a glorious kiss.

Warm lips covered Thiel's mouth, moving slowly but deliberately, tasting of sweet wine and the promise of making his wildest fantasies come true. In dreams about this particular subject, his imagination had always failed him and somehow, it mostly involved a bed in a nice, comfortable warm room. But Thiel was afraid that if he didn't take what was offered right now, he might never get another chance.

He took off Boerne's coat and started to unbutton the waistcoat underneath his jacket. His fingers were stale in the freezing cold, but Boerne managed to raise his body temperature in a flash by kissing him again. Thiel relieved him of his jacket and waistcoat, dropping them in the snow without a second thought. Boerne didn't seem to mind: the man who was always very meticulous about his clothing couldn't care less about them right now. He was trying very hard to keep his hands to himself, thus savouring this special, magical moment between them. But when Thiel's ice-cold fingers brushed against the skin, his vocal chords produced a startled squeak and any self restraint he had left died instantly. He pulled him in a firm embrace, longing to feel as much of Thiel's body against his. The policeman staggered backwards against the BMW, his hands going for Boerne's neck and upwards, pushing his hat off, threading his fingers through the short hair.

In search for a more comfortable spot, they moved away from the car and stumbled towards the row of oak trees that marked the end of the parking lot. Not really knowing where they were going -not really caring either. They ended up underneath the largest oak tree when Thiel tripped and held onto Boerne's tie to keep from falling. The professor lost his balance and they both went down into the soft bed of snow. Soon their lips locked again and they pulled each other close in an effort to generate enough heat to distract them from their icy love nest. Despite the cold and Boerne's shrieks, when parts of bare flesh touched the snow, they were reluctant to let common sense prevail. They wanted each other so badly, but tensed up at the slightest touch of cold, possessive hands. Not even their hot lips could safely enjoy the feeling of exploring. Boerne was not able to suppress his whimpering cries when their arctic bed sent jolts of adrenaline through his veins. They desperately refused to let environmental conditions take its toll, but it was an uneven battle. As much as endorphins and testosterone were unleashed, the effect of making love in the snow was the equivalent of having sex under a cold shower.

When they became aware of a radiant glow that suddenly appeared around them, they finally found a reason to give up. They looked up and squinted at the intrusive lights that seemed to produce a low humming noise as well. Slowly their eyes adapted and they saw the outline of a car just in front of them. The door opened and the sound of a Christmas song blared into the night. The driver emerged and watched them silently, smoking his cigarette. Thick, gently falling snowflakes made it difficult to recognize anyone beyond the bright light but when Thiel spotted a genuine Christmas hat and a white beard, while the cheery 'Alll I want for Christmas is you' battered his ears, his jaw dropped at this surreal sight. Unsteadily he rose, convinced he would wake up from this very strange dream anytime now.

"I see you managed to come up with a suitable gift."

Thiel recognized the voice, but his senses were still spiked and he wasn't sure if his imagination was playing tricks on him. "Dad?"

"You did call a taxicab." his father said stoically. "How about I take the two of you to some place nice and warm."

"That would be very nice of you, Herr Thiel." Boerne said with chattering teeth, not in the least bothered by the fact that Thiel's father had caught them in the act. He lay sprawled out on the ground, with his shirt half undone and was fumbling about in the snow for his glasses.

When his son didn't speak and seemed reluctant to take him up on the offer, Herbert pointed at his trousers and said, "You wouldn't want to get frostbite there now, would you?"

Deeply embarrassed, Thiel resisted the urge to look down to check if his fly was undone. Boerne came up behind him, shivering like a leaf, but with a look of joy on his features that made Thiel's heart glow.

"Let's get you into some clothes." He took off his cap to place it on Boerne's skull.

"As long as you promise to unwrap me again as soon as we get home."

Thiel felt Herbert's eyes burning in his back. He wanted to tell Boerne just what he would like to do with him for the rest of his life, but instead he settled for a simple "I promise."

He helped Boerne button his shirt, chivalrously shielding his nakedness from Herbert. Then he gathered his clothes and pushed the shivering professor in the backseat of his dad's Mercedes.

Herbert brushed the snow from his son's shoulders with a disapproving look from underneath the jolly Christmas hat. His silence was unnerving and Thiel's brain had temporarily lost the ability to function properly. His emotions were in turmoil; ranging from sheer joy to utter embarrassment and he didn't know what to say.

Demonstrably, Herbert closed the door behind Boerne and opened the passenger door. "You're sitting next to me."

Thiel suddenly remembered how it had felt as a child, when he was about be reprimanded. He got into the car without another word and avoided looking at his father when he took the seat behind the wheel.

"You're not sitting next to him in my car ever again." Herbert stated and put the gear in reverse. "I have seen enough disturbing things tonight, to last me the rest of my life."

Thiel was mortified, but Boerne didn't miss the bright smile on Herbert's face when he backed out of the parking space.


End file.
